I visited my oldest friend in New Mexico this weekend for her baby shower for her accidental third child with her husband she is married to for the second time.
While I was down there, I found myself envious of her pregnancy on a very subtle, instinctual, almost subconscious level. I have been around her during all of her pregnancies, and this is the only time I found myself thinking "I want a baby inside me" as I saw her belly move.
It's entirely new for me to crave that state, and I did. And I didn't even think about it. I saw the baby kick, and my body thought it for me.
Yet around her children, I didn't feel ready for the child part. I wasn't ready for the constant noise and raising.
Maybe it's a process. Maybe I get ready for pregnancy first then the actual child. I don't think I'll ever truly be completely ready, but this step freaking scared me.
On a side note, after attending this shower, if I ever have a daughter, my baby shower invitation will read: "NO FUCKING PINK! Any pink gifts will be returned and/or burned." It's like pink went to die at this shower in a horrible explosion of rabbit dawned clothes.
3 therapist(s):
I'm always ready for kids :)
The pink part made me laugh hysterically. I almost puke looking at my niece's closet. No lie. And that was happening BEFORE she was born! Yikes!
A friend of mine didn't find out what she was having, and let me tell you, I was sooooo excited to see her little girl get some yellow and green! It was fabulous! :)
I can't almost stand to be around anyone else's children for a long time either, but it is different when the child is your own.
You will be surprised at how much you don't notice the noise when it is yours.
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